Mending Piece By Piece Newsletter

Why New Year’s Is Challenging When You’re Grieving

As the world counts down, cheers, and celebrates new beginnings, you might find yourself feeling out of sync — watching from a distance, numb, overwhelmed, or even disconnected. While others make resolutions and toast to the future, you may be holding grief in your hands and heart, wondering how to step into a new year without someone you love.

If New Year’s feels heavy for you, you are not alone.
Grief doesn’t understand calendars. It doesn’t reset at midnight. And the pressure to “start fresh” can feel impossible, and even painful.

New Year’s can be especially challenging for many reasons:

1. You’re dreading the first year without your loved one. Crossing into a new year can feel like leaving something precious behind — or like widening the distance between you and the person you lost. It’s not just a date on the calendar; it’s a marker of time you never wanted to move through.

2. You’re reluctant to let go of the past — even if it was painful. Grief can make the past feel safer than the present. Even distressing memories can feel comforting because they still include your loved one. A new year can feel like it’s asking you to “move on,” even though what you want is to hold on.

3. You relive memories of past celebrations with your loved one. New Year’s Eve evokes images, sounds, and moments from years past — celebrations, laughter, phone calls, and traditions. These memories can be both beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time.

4. You’re adjusting to a new identity and new responsibilities. Life after loss often comes with financial stress, household changes, new roles, loneliness, and emotional exhaustion. Entering a new year while still learning how to survive each day can feel overwhelming.

Gentle Tips for Coping with New Year’s When You’re Grieving

While the world pushes for celebration, resolutions, and a “fresh start,” you may be simply trying to get through the day. Here are some compassionate ways to support yourself on January 1:

1. Release the pressure to feel a certain way. Ignore the cultural script that says you must be hopeful, energized, or ready for a new beginning. You do not need resolutions. You do not need a plan. You only need compassion for yourself.

2. Allow your emotions — whatever they are. Grief can feel heavier when the world turns the page. Sadness, anger, numbness, longing, confusion, or even brief moments of relief or joy are all normal. Nothing you feel is wrong.

3. Keep the day simple. You don’t have to attend gatherings, answer texts, or participate in traditions that feel too painful. Give yourself permission to stay home, rest, or move slowly.

4. Set boundaries without guilt. It’s okay to protect your emotional energy. You don’t have to explain, justify, or apologize for needing space.

5. Connect with someone who “gets it.” Reach out to a friend, support group, or community that understands grief. Even a message exchange can lighten the weight of the day.

6. Take breaks from social media. New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day often overflow with “perfect moment” posts. If these feel triggering, protect your heart and step away.

7. Do something grounding. This could be as small as drinking warm tea, journaling, lighting a candle, stretching, sitting outside, or taking a short walk.
Your body deserves care, too.

Ways to Honor Your Loved One on January 1

If it feels right, here are gentle ways to bring your loved one into the start of the year — not as a reminder of loss, but as a continuation of love.

1. Light a candle in their honor. Let the flame represent the love that continues to live within you.

2. Speak their name out loud. Say a memory, a message, or simply: “I love you.”
Their name deserves to be spoken.

3. Create a small ritual that feels meaningful. You can do this by listening to their favorite song/music, watching something you enjoyed together, or cooking food they loved. Simple rituals often bring surprising comfort.

4. Write them a letter or note. Tell them what the past year has been without them.
Tell them what you miss.
Tell them what you hope for.
This is not moving on — it’s staying connected.

5. Choose a word for the year that honors their memory. Words like “Hope,” “Strength,” “Courage,” “Grace,” or “Love” can become anchors.

6. Visit a place that feels connected to them. Whether physical or symbolic, being in that space may bring closeness and peace.

7. Do one small act of kindness in their name. Donate, volunteer, pay for someone’s coffee, or simply offer a smile.
Honoring them through compassion keeps their spirit alive in the world.

8. Reflect on how they shaped who you are. Your loved one continues to live in your choices, your values, your relationships, and the love you carry forward.

💙 Men’s Mental Health Summit — Save the Date

Over the past several years, through my work as a therapist, speaker, and grief advocate, I’ve witnessed how often men struggle in silence with their mental health and grief. These conversations have been happening quietly for a long time — in sessions, in community spaces, and in the stories men share when they finally feel safe to speak.

This past year, I began intentionally building space for these voices by interviewing men on the Mending Piece by Piece Podcast and engaging more directly with men through YouTube and community conversations. Again and again, the same message has emerged: there is a deep need for spaces where men can talk openly about grief, mental health, and emotional pain without judgment.

That’s why I’m beginning to plan a Men’s Mental Health Summit, coming in April 2026.

• This summit will focus on:

  • men’s mental health and emotional well-being

  • grief and loss

  • vulnerability, identity, and connection

  • breaking the silence that so many men carry

More details — including the date, speakers, and registration — will be shared as plans continue to unfold.

If this resonates with you or someone you love, I invite you to stay connected and watch for updates.

Mending Piece By Piece Podcast

Episode 6: Navigating Grief, Fatherhood & Resilience with Hogan Hilling
Hogan Hilling shares his powerful journey as a father navigating grief, disability, emotional support, and men’s mental health. This conversation dives deep into the long-term impact of grief and the importance of breaking the silence around men’s emotional experiences.

Episode 7: Navigating Grief After Suicide: A Brother’s Story of Healing & Hope. In this episode of Mending Piece by Piece, Govan Martin shares his personal journey after losing his brother Michael to suicide, offering insight into the lifelong nature of grief and the importance of open, honest conversations around mental health. Together, we explore how emotional “backpacks” shape our healing, why community connection matters, and how advocacy can transform unimaginable loss into meaningful change.

Subscribe to see more videos and the Podcast on YouTube

Ways to Support Mending Piece by Piece

If you’d like to support this work, here are gentle ways to do so: 🛍️ Shop the Mending Piece by Piece Store Shirts, mugs, blankets, totes, and mental health awareness items.

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Looking for additional resources to assist you with the grief process? Check out the Mending Piece by Piece Workbooks & Journals below.