Mending Piece By Piece Newsletter

New Year, New Intentions: Setting Goals for Healing

As the calendar turns to a new year, many feel pressure to set ambitious resolutions or make dramatic life changes. For those navigating grief, however, the idea of setting goals may feel overwhelming. Instead of focusing on rigid resolutions, consider embracing intentions—gentle, realistic goals that nurture your healing journey while fostering hope and growth.

Healing from loss is not about erasing grief but learning to live alongside it. Setting meaningful intentions allows you to honor your emotions, take steps toward well-being, and find small moments of peace. Here are some suggestions to guide you in creating personal goals that support your healing:

1. Start Small and Be Specific
   Focus on manageable, specific actions rather than broad goals. For example, instead of saying, “I want to feel better,” try, “I will take a 10-minute walk outside three times a week to clear my mind.” Small, achievable steps can build confidence and momentum.

2. Honor Your Loved One
   Set an intention to keep your loved one’s memory alive in meaningful ways. This could include starting a memory journal, creating a photo book, or dedicating a monthly activity in their honor. Finding ways to integrate their memory into your life can bring comfort and purpose.

3. Prioritize Self-Compassion
   Grieving is a deeply personal process, and it’s important to give yourself grace. An intention like, “I will be kind to myself on hard days and celebrate small victories,” can remind you to treat yourself with patience and understanding.

4. Focus on Connection
   Grief can feel isolating, but connecting with others who understand can be healing. Set an intention to reach out to a trusted friend, join a support group, or participate in a community event. Building connections can provide comfort and reduce feelings of loneliness.

5. Explore a New Practice for Healing
   Consider trying activities that promote emotional and physical well-being, such as yoga, meditation, or journaling. An intention like, “I will journal for five minutes a day to process my emotions,” can help you develop healthy coping strategies.

6. Create Boundaries for Your Energy
   Grief can be draining, so it’s important to protect your energy. Set intentions to say no to obligations that feel overwhelming or to carve out time for rest. For example, “I will take 30 minutes each day to do something that brings me peace.”

7. Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection
   Healing isn’t linear, and it’s okay to have setbacks. Set an intention to focus on progress rather than perfection. Celebrate small milestones, such as feeling a moment of joy or accomplishing a simple task, and remind yourself that each step forward matters.

8. Embrace Gratitude While Grieving
   Balancing grief with gratitude can foster hope. An intention like, “I will write down one thing I’m thankful for each week,” can help shift your focus to the moments of light that coexist with sorrow.

9. Leave Room for Adaptation
   Your needs may change as you navigate the year. Be open to adjusting your intentions as necessary. What feels helpful in January may evolve by June, and that’s okay.

As you step into the new year, remember that setting intentions is not about “fixing” grief but about creating a path forward that aligns with your healing journey. By setting gentle goals, you honor your loved one, nurture your well-being, and take steps toward a life where hope and growth coexist with your loss.

Coping with Post-Holiday Blues

The holiday season, while filled with moments of connection and tradition, can leave many feeling emotionally drained or experiencing renewed waves of grief. The contrast between the busyness of the holidays and the quiet of the new year often highlights the absence of loved ones or deepens feelings of loneliness and sadness. Additionally, the shorter days and colder weather of winter can contribute to seasonal affective disorder (SAD) or "winter blues," amplifying feelings of fatigue, sadness, and disconnection. It’s important to recognize that these emotions are a natural response to the emotional highs and lows of the season and the seasonal shift.

If you’re struggling with post-holiday blues or winter blues, here are some strategies that can help:

1. Create Space for Your Emotions
   Grief and sadness don’t have a schedule. Allow yourself to feel sadness, grief, or melancholy without judgment. Naming and validating your emotions is the first step toward understanding and addressing them. Journaling, meditating, or talking to a trusted friend or therapist can help you process these emotions.

2. Let in Natural Light
   Shorter days can take a toll on your mood. Open your blinds, sit by a window, or take a walk outside during daylight hours to soak in as much natural light as possible. Consider using a light therapy box if you suspect seasonal affective disorder. Verilux HappyLight Lucent - One-Touch Light Therapy Lamp is popular with my clients.

3. Focus on Small Joys
   Start your day by identifying one thing to look forward to, no matter how small. It could be a warm cup of tea, a walk in nature, or listening to a favorite song. Cultivating small moments of happiness can help combat feelings of emptiness.

4. Stay Active
   Movement can boost your mood and energy levels. Whether it’s a short walk, yoga, or an at-home workout, staying physically active can help combat both post-holiday and winter blues.

5. Lean on Your Support Network
   You’re not alone in feeling this way. Reach out to friends, family, or a support group. Sharing how you’re feeling can help lighten the emotional load and remind you that you’re not alone.

6. Create New Rhythms
   After the hustle and bustle of the holidays, establishing a calming daily routine can provide comfort and structure. Prioritize restful activities like reading, journaling, or meditating to re-center yourself.

7. Focus on Nourishment
   Eating nutritious foods and staying hydrated can support your physical and emotional well-being. Limit excess sugar and caffeine, which can contribute to mood swings.

8. Plan Something to Look Forward To
   The post-holiday lull can feel endless without something on the horizon. Plan a simple activity, like a movie night, coffee with a friend, vacation, or a day trip, to give yourself something positive to anticipate.

9. Honor Your Loved One’s Memory
   If grief feels heavier after the holidays, find ways to honor your loved one in the new year. Light a candle in their memory, create a scrapbook, or participate in an activity they loved. These acts can bring a sense of closeness and comfor

10. Seek Professional Help if Needed
    If your feelings of sadness, grief, or fatigue persist or feel overwhelming, don’t hesitate to seek support from a mental health professional. Therapy or counseling can provide valuable tools to help you navigate this challenging time.

Remember, both grief and seasonal affective blues are valid experiences that deserve care and attention. By acknowledging and addressing your emotions with compassion, you can navigate the post-holiday season in a way that prioritizes your well-being.

Mending Moment

Mending Piece By Piece Podcast

We are nearing the end of Season 2 and you don’t want to miss these powerful episodes. Listen to Episode 8 today!

Click the episode to listen/watch on Spotify or the button below to watch/listen on YouTube.

Episode 8: Two Journeys of Grief: Navigating Loss of a Child and Best Friend with Tasha Ives (Part 1)

In this episode, Linda Falasco reviews the previous season of her podcast and provides updates. She also discusses coping with the emotions that arise after suicide loss, including feelings of guilt, anger, and confusion. Linda shares information about the candlelight vigil she hosts every year to remember those lost to suicide. She emphasizes the importance of honoring the memory of loved ones and finding ways to keep their legacy alive. Linda encourages listeners to seek support and not isolate themselves during the grieving process.

Episode 9: Part 2 of Tasha Ives Journey will be available on 1/21/2025

Subscribe to see more videos and the Podcast on YouTube

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